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One of the ways I measure my life now,

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about once a year, I stop and I think

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about where I'm at. Am I on the right

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track?Here's the

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question that I have to answer every

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year. Is the life

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I have now worth

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having killed for it?

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It's easy to look back and go, that was

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the wrong choice.

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People talk about

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remorse and don't you feel bad about what

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happened?Yeah, I feel bad

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about what happened.

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I didn't have what I

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saw as a viable choice then.

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I want people to realize that there is

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bad all around them. Pay

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attention to your world. Pay attention to

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the people around you.

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Evil lives everywhere.

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Pay attention.

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Every parent should be careful because

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you don't know the lesson you're teaching

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sometimes.

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I don't think any child grows

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up notfirst

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feeling that their parents are theirgods.

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I was betrayed by the gods of my

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childhood.

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These people were supposed to bring me

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into the world, protect me, and

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raise me so that I could function in it.

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There were times life was

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fantastic.

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My father and I would take off and go

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camping. When it was

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just the two of us in that kind of

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setting, everything was great.

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It's probably about as close to happy as

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I can remember.

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Now, you see this lure?This is one of my

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favorites. I've caught a lot of fish with

44
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this lure. But

45
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there was one time I said something that

46
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he took as being a, you know,

47
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smart-mouthed dancer. Get me that

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sleeping bag, all right?I'll get it when

49
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I'm done.

50
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And the backhand came across.

51
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You do what I tell you to do, boy. You

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got it?Don't say

53
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smart-mouthed things. You

54
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back-talk, and I will hit you.

55
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When I ask you to do something, you do it

56
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right away. He was a

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very... Large,

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powerful person. A

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backhand from him. That's not a love

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tap. Not from him.

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He thought of it as discipline.

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But at the same time, there were times

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we'd go out and everything's great, and

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it never occurs to me that this is

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anything other than my best friend.

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When things are good, it's very easy to

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forget the bad that happened, at least

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for a little while.

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My brother was never expected to do

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anything.

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My father invested all of his

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effort in his number one son.

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I got all of the attention.

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But every year, the

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discipline becomes worse,

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and failure has constantly

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increasing costs.

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There was a time when my father

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wanted me to vacuum up our dining room.

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And somewhere along the line, I picked up

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a little screwdriver, and I just put it

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in my pocket. And while I

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was vacuuming, the thing fell out of my

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pocket. My dad came in to

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see how the vacuuming went, and so

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he's looking over the whole floor,

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and he went absolutely

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ballistic. Did you vacuum the whole

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room?Yes. Really?

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BecauseWell, what's this?How could I

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possibly miss this screwdriver

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sitting in the middle of the floor if I

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had actually vacuumed the floor?

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What's this?Huh

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Off comes the belt, and...

96
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you just start hitting. I

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told you! Never lie to me!

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Ever!Just losing control and

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continuing to hit. You just don't

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learn! Please stop! You think I wanna do

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this?This is for your own good!

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Don't lie to me! Ever! You wanna get

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trust?Come

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on!

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For my mother, typically, once that

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started, she would simply walk into

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another room and wait. It would be

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absolutely pointless for her to step in

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between, because the only thing that

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could happen at that point is her getting

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hit. Ohh

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But every time...

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that I wound up

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getting beat down.

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Afterwards, there was my mother

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making me feel better.

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It was my mother who would, you know,

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put a bandage on it or help with the

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ice or, if necessary, take me up to

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the hospital. She was

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always comforting.

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Just do what he says. Don't talk

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back. You know,

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encouragement on how to avoid it.

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It was always me and my mother.

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When I was in the 3rd grade, I failed

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a spelling report

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and rather than show my

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dad this grade, which was kind of what

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the school required, you have to take the

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grades and get it signed off and bring it

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back. I changed the grade or I forwarded

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his signature. One of the two took him

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back to school,

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and shortly thereafter, the principal, of

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course, dutifully got a hold of my father

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and let him know what the problem was.

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He was so mad. Not only did

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I fail, but worse than

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anything, I covered

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it up and lied to him

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and that.

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Absolutely required punishment.

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And it just kept

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going until I couldn't stand there

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anymore. He used me like a

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freaking pinata. All

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you really think about is just please

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stop. Eventually he just

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got out of breath and as to the heart and

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got tired.

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When my mother did get home, she put me

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in a tub filled with ice and water

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to try and get the you know swelling from

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everywhere down.

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He has to be stopped. Wouldn't it

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just bebetter if he was dead.

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Like how happy we would be.

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It's okay. It's gonna be all right, okay?

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'Cause you are

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strong. HuhI'm sitting in the tub

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of ice, and

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I hurt, and...

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I'm absolutely

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hating my father.

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And she's sitting there going, You've got

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to do something about this. You can't

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keep going through this. Wouldn't

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it be better if he was dead?I don't think

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how happy we would be.

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I was in the third freaking grade.

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How are you supposed to take that?

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You're sitting there and... Anything

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that's not numb from ice hurts.

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It's not a big leap to go, yeah, it'd

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be better if he was dead. Don't

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go do this. The

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suggestion in the tub, without a doubt,

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changed everything for me,

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because it took me from

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just trying to survive what was happening

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to trying to figure out how I could fix

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the future.

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You'll know what to do.

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After the bathtub, we

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sit down and had a little chat. Eric,

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come here.

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Come. She asked

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the question, how?Can

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we stop him?

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And that's what solidifies,

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in my mind, that I'm the

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one that needs to do this. I'm the one

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that needs to come up with a solution.

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Have you thought of anything yet?How to

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get rid of him?I don't know.

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And so we went through

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multiple scenarios and options.

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She would ask, out of all the ways that

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you could possibly kill him, what do

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you think is the best way?

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OK, what do you need

203
00:12:53,557 --> 00:12:54,157
to do that?

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Eric, I have a plan that I think

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is really going to work.

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took a lot of vitamins.

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And, well, my mom found these plank

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capsules that happened to resemble

209
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several different kinds he had.

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So she started packing them with

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everything from rat poison to

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Valium. You know, I

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come in one time and she's just putting

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them all together and refilling the

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bottle.

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After it's done, there

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was the next few hours of kind

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of being on edge because is it going to

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work?Is it not?Is he going to figure it

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out?He gets up and says,

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you know, I feel dizzy or I'm

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feeling sick.

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Does he know?

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The reason for helping

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my mother, I was always

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taught to believe that you're

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supposed to

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protect, defend, support your

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family against anybody and

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anything and if. My

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definition of family seems a little

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strange because it somehow excluded my

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father. It excluded him

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because he became the threat.

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There were so many times that I walked in

236
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and she was spiking something

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from mashed potatoes to cans of tuna.

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Go set this on the table.

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Here, take this glass out to your dad.

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Don't take a sip of that. And

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00:15:21,164 --> 00:15:22,845
then we would, you know, sit down at the

242
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table, have dinner. But do you

243
00:15:25,605 --> 00:15:28,205
use the gravy or what was it spiked with?

244
00:15:29,245 --> 00:15:31,085
The mashed potatoes might be OK, but

245
00:15:32,325 --> 00:15:33,485
what's that white there?

246
00:15:36,685 --> 00:15:39,405
She went about trying to poison

247
00:15:39,565 --> 00:15:41,165
him for

248
00:15:42,045 --> 00:15:43,566
seven, eight years. To

249
00:15:45,006 --> 00:15:47,246
keep doing that day in and day out

250
00:15:47,246 --> 00:15:49,246
requires a lot of

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00:15:49,246 --> 00:15:51,246
patience and planning.

252
00:15:52,926 --> 00:15:55,326
But I don't think he was ever

253
00:15:55,326 --> 00:15:57,246
suspicious about his food was being

254
00:15:57,246 --> 00:15:59,886
tampered with. I don't think it crossed

255
00:15:59,886 --> 00:16:02,166
his mind that she could

256
00:16:02,206 --> 00:16:04,487
possibly get the backbone to try and kill

257
00:16:04,487 --> 00:16:04,607
him.

258
00:16:21,407 --> 00:16:24,128
This just isn't working, Eric. It just

259
00:16:24,368 --> 00:16:26,608
isn't doing it.

260
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Every poisoning that fails,

261
00:16:30,608 --> 00:16:33,488
there was always this push

262
00:16:33,488 --> 00:16:36,048
for me doing something directly

263
00:16:36,448 --> 00:16:39,328
and extreme. You have to find something

264
00:16:39,328 --> 00:16:41,888
to end this problem permanently. The

265
00:16:41,888 --> 00:16:43,968
poisoning was simply something so that

266
00:16:43,968 --> 00:16:46,449
she could say, see, I'm doing what I can.

267
00:16:47,889 --> 00:16:50,449
Why haven't you done what you're

268
00:16:50,449 --> 00:16:52,769
supposed to?Step up, Eric.

269
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When are you going to get the nerve to go

270
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shoot him?

271
00:17:00,169 --> 00:17:02,689
What's the problem?You have to do this.

272
00:17:04,049 --> 00:17:05,009
You have to do this now. No

273
00:17:06,930 --> 00:17:07,810
more stalling.

274
00:17:10,290 --> 00:17:13,090
Why don't you hide behind the door so

275
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that he doesn't see it coming?

276
00:17:24,370 --> 00:17:26,851
The plan was to stay

277
00:17:26,851 --> 00:17:29,011
behind where our door opened

278
00:17:29,171 --> 00:17:31,651
and then when he came home, he would go

279
00:17:31,651 --> 00:17:34,291
through and when the door closed, it

280
00:17:34,291 --> 00:17:36,611
would give me a clear line of sight at

281
00:17:36,611 --> 00:17:37,171
the back of

282
00:17:40,011 --> 00:17:42,611
him. Standing behind that door, I was

283
00:17:42,611 --> 00:17:44,531
absolutely terrified.

284
00:17:46,211 --> 00:17:48,212
He comes home, goes through the door.

285
00:17:50,212 --> 00:17:53,092
I couldn't move. This

286
00:17:53,092 --> 00:17:54,292
isn't going to work.

287
00:18:06,052 --> 00:18:08,613
Standing behind that door, I was

288
00:18:08,613 --> 00:18:11,333
absolutely terrified. He

289
00:18:11,333 --> 00:18:13,173
comes home, goes through the door.

290
00:18:14,933 --> 00:18:16,853
I freeze up. I can't do anything.

291
00:18:19,333 --> 00:18:21,973
He was so big. And the gun was

292
00:18:21,973 --> 00:18:24,773
so small, pulling the trigger

293
00:18:24,773 --> 00:18:27,333
and failing. That was a fear.

294
00:18:28,694 --> 00:18:31,174
It's just complete and total

295
00:18:32,214 --> 00:18:33,974
paralyzed right there.

296
00:18:37,694 --> 00:18:40,534
And he goes in and lays down

297
00:18:40,534 --> 00:18:42,854
on the couch to take a nap.

298
00:18:44,294 --> 00:18:45,734
And I'm stuck

299
00:18:47,334 --> 00:18:48,774
at this doorway.

300
00:18:51,015 --> 00:18:53,495
And then trying to sneak out of there

301
00:18:53,495 --> 00:18:55,215
when I finally hear him snoring.

302
00:19:02,455 --> 00:19:03,975
And I remember talking to my mom

303
00:19:03,975 --> 00:19:06,775
afterwards about that and her asking

304
00:19:07,295 --> 00:19:09,575
what happened and me trying to explain I

305
00:19:09,575 --> 00:19:12,056
just couldn't do it. Why not?

306
00:19:12,456 --> 00:19:14,856
I don't know. I just couldn't do it. I

307
00:19:14,856 --> 00:19:16,936
couldn't move. And

308
00:19:17,976 --> 00:19:20,136
she basically just. talked me through

309
00:19:20,136 --> 00:19:22,736
calming down and reassured me that it'd

310
00:19:22,736 --> 00:19:23,976
be a better day tomorrow.

311
00:19:25,736 --> 00:19:28,216
We'll do this. We'll do it together.

312
00:19:34,617 --> 00:19:37,177
The pressure kept growing. If I'm gonna

313
00:19:37,177 --> 00:19:39,817
be the man, then I

314
00:19:39,897 --> 00:19:41,737
have to step up and protect them.

315
00:19:43,497 --> 00:19:45,297
I'm the only one who can do something

316
00:19:45,297 --> 00:19:48,137
about it. This eventually

317
00:19:48,137 --> 00:19:50,617
reached a point where she winds up

318
00:19:50,617 --> 00:19:52,538
telling me that if this doesn't happen,

319
00:19:52,538 --> 00:19:55,258
that she's leaving and not coming

320
00:19:55,258 --> 00:19:57,978
back until he's dead. She was going to

321
00:19:57,978 --> 00:20:00,298
take her stuff gone, and we were going to

322
00:20:00,298 --> 00:20:01,818
fend for ourselves with him.

323
00:20:09,308 --> 00:20:11,708
On the night he died, it finally comes

324
00:20:11,708 --> 00:20:14,509
down to she leaves

325
00:20:18,589 --> 00:20:19,629
and.

326
00:20:22,059 --> 00:20:23,579
Then there was a phone call.

327
00:20:24,939 --> 00:20:27,579
I'm going to be back in about 10 or

328
00:20:27,579 --> 00:20:30,379
15 minutes, and if he's not dead,

329
00:20:30,379 --> 00:20:33,300
I'm leaving. That's dead.

330
00:20:33,300 --> 00:20:33,900
I'm done.

331
00:20:49,660 --> 00:20:52,220
My father was asleep on a couch

332
00:20:53,581 --> 00:20:56,461
and I was standing

333
00:20:57,821 --> 00:21:00,461
just a few feet back from his head.

334
00:21:04,301 --> 00:21:06,941
Part of me, I want to just raise the gun

335
00:21:06,941 --> 00:21:09,261
and pull the trigger and do this.

336
00:21:09,901 --> 00:21:12,261
And another part is I'm just having a

337
00:21:12,261 --> 00:21:14,942
real problem finding the ability to pull

338
00:21:14,942 --> 00:21:15,582
the trigger.

339
00:21:17,902 --> 00:21:20,302
Pulling that trigger is going to change

340
00:21:20,382 --> 00:21:21,262
everything. And

341
00:21:23,502 --> 00:21:25,582
then I see the light

342
00:21:26,942 --> 00:21:28,782
and I know it's her car coming back.

343
00:21:30,942 --> 00:21:33,782
I knew beyond a shadow of a

344
00:21:33,782 --> 00:21:36,423
doubt at that point that if

345
00:21:36,463 --> 00:21:38,463
he's not dead by the time she walks

346
00:21:38,463 --> 00:21:41,263
through that door, I'm

347
00:21:41,263 --> 00:21:43,183
choosing to be with him forever.

348
00:21:44,863 --> 00:21:45,423
That's it.

349
00:21:54,543 --> 00:21:56,544
I wound up pulling the trigger

350
00:22:01,984 --> 00:22:03,504
after I pulled the trigger.

351
00:22:05,184 --> 00:22:07,864
The door opened, and my

352
00:22:07,864 --> 00:22:09,744
mom took the gun from me.

353
00:22:11,264 --> 00:22:14,104
She did it. Stay there. Give it to

354
00:22:14,104 --> 00:22:16,345
me. Give it to me.

355
00:22:21,265 --> 00:22:24,145
She goes over to make

356
00:22:24,145 --> 00:22:26,385
sure that he is dead.

357
00:22:28,305 --> 00:22:30,225
Picks up the phones and calls the police.

358
00:22:31,985 --> 00:22:34,625
She kept talking the whole time she was

359
00:22:34,705 --> 00:22:36,785
getting ready for the police to arrive.

360
00:22:37,986 --> 00:22:40,466
Say it. Have a

361
00:22:40,466 --> 00:22:42,626
story and stick to it.

362
00:22:44,066 --> 00:22:46,946
I found a gun. I tripped carrying it

363
00:22:46,946 --> 00:22:49,826
into him. It went off. We

364
00:22:49,826 --> 00:22:52,146
called the police. That was it.

365
00:22:53,426 --> 00:22:56,306
And if I do that, then

366
00:22:57,026 --> 00:22:59,187
there's nothing that they can put on her.

367
00:22:59,667 --> 00:23:01,747
And in a worst case scenario.

368
00:23:03,427 --> 00:23:06,387
I will go to Judy and get

369
00:23:06,387 --> 00:23:09,347
out when I'm 18, because they

370
00:23:09,347 --> 00:23:11,027
can't hold me as an adult. Good.

371
00:23:16,107 --> 00:23:18,468
Yes. And I was willing

372
00:23:19,268 --> 00:23:22,148
to pay that price for my mother, for

373
00:23:22,148 --> 00:23:22,948
my brother,

374
00:23:25,668 --> 00:23:28,228
so everything could go on

375
00:23:28,708 --> 00:23:31,668
and have a good life. Good job,

376
00:23:32,348 --> 00:23:33,908
big man. You did it.

377
00:23:39,589 --> 00:23:41,549
The detective started questioning me.

378
00:23:41,549 --> 00:23:44,469
Well, OK, look, I know this

379
00:23:44,469 --> 00:23:47,429
is tough. Look, I-- was your

380
00:23:47,429 --> 00:23:50,229
mom home when you shot your

381
00:23:50,229 --> 00:23:53,069
dad?She was present for whatever

382
00:23:53,069 --> 00:23:55,709
got said. No.

383
00:23:56,869 --> 00:23:59,029
She arrived a few moments afterwards.

384
00:24:01,630 --> 00:24:04,430
OK, I didn't really get the sense that

385
00:24:04,430 --> 00:24:07,190
she was proud because I had killed him.

386
00:24:08,790 --> 00:24:10,390
But later on that evening,

387
00:24:11,470 --> 00:24:14,390
when the police finally had

388
00:24:14,390 --> 00:24:16,310
to say it looks like this was an

389
00:24:16,310 --> 00:24:19,190
accident, then

390
00:24:19,270 --> 00:24:20,631
she was proud of me.

391
00:24:23,671 --> 00:24:25,271
I had stuck with the plan.

392
00:24:36,311 --> 00:24:39,191
How I felt after that was just

393
00:24:40,311 --> 00:24:43,192
really numb and indifferent. It's

394
00:24:43,192 --> 00:24:45,752
just, oh, that's over.

395
00:24:46,552 --> 00:24:49,512
There was no guilt to it.

396
00:24:49,912 --> 00:24:52,552
At that point, all I could really

397
00:24:52,552 --> 00:24:54,472
see was that

398
00:24:55,672 --> 00:24:57,992
what I needed to do had been done.

399
00:25:03,913 --> 00:25:05,713
Did I know the difference between right

400
00:25:05,713 --> 00:25:08,473
and wrong?Yes. Did I know

401
00:25:08,473 --> 00:25:10,553
murder was wrong?Yes.

402
00:25:12,393 --> 00:25:13,353
People talk about

403
00:25:15,993 --> 00:25:18,313
remorse and don't you feel bad about what

404
00:25:18,313 --> 00:25:21,193
happened?Yeah, I feel bad

405
00:25:21,193 --> 00:25:22,233
about what happened.

406
00:25:26,154 --> 00:25:28,954
I didn't. Have what I

407
00:25:28,954 --> 00:25:31,114
saw as a viable choice that

408
00:25:41,754 --> 00:25:44,075
I missed the good times I had with mydad.

409
00:25:50,955 --> 00:25:52,555
I have to get up every day

410
00:25:54,315 --> 00:25:55,195
knowing that.

411
00:25:57,835 --> 00:25:59,515
I took out one of the most important

412
00:25:59,515 --> 00:26:00,795
figures in my life.

413
00:26:03,995 --> 00:26:05,836
And what I can do

414
00:26:07,036 --> 00:26:08,716
is live my life

415
00:26:10,036 --> 00:26:12,076
and make it a good one, because it cost

416
00:26:12,076 --> 00:26:13,676
me a hell of a lot to get it.

417
00:26:19,996 --> 00:26:22,076
So let's talk about-- Can we stop for

418
00:26:22,076 --> 00:26:24,396
just a minute?Sure, sure, sureYeah,

419
00:26:44,967 --> 00:26:46,408
definitely. She was always called

420
00:26:46,408 --> 00:26:48,968
grandma. My mother

421
00:26:48,968 --> 00:26:51,448
acted like she really liked Elaine.

422
00:26:52,648 --> 00:26:54,408
She liked the same brand of cigarettes

423
00:26:54,408 --> 00:26:56,398
that Elaine smoked. And they were

424
00:26:56,398 --> 00:26:58,478
perfectly happy to sit there and sip on

425
00:26:58,478 --> 00:27:01,358
Tom Collins together. There were never

426
00:27:01,358 --> 00:27:02,398
any arguments.

427
00:27:13,039 --> 00:27:15,919
I remember seeing her adding

428
00:27:15,919 --> 00:27:18,239
something to a drink she was mixing.

429
00:27:22,559 --> 00:27:23,599
What's going on?

430
00:27:37,920 --> 00:27:39,440
Killing him should have been the turning

431
00:27:39,440 --> 00:27:42,160
point of we're going to have a bright and

432
00:27:42,160 --> 00:27:43,840
happy future after this.

433
00:27:45,920 --> 00:27:48,801
The problem is she wouldn't,

434
00:27:49,441 --> 00:27:51,761
couldn't, settle into

435
00:27:51,761 --> 00:27:54,241
just having a nice life.

436
00:28:10,162 --> 00:28:12,402
I had come in and startled her,

437
00:28:13,202 --> 00:28:16,002
seeing her add something to Elaine's

438
00:28:16,002 --> 00:28:18,482
drink. What are you doing?

439
00:28:25,282 --> 00:28:27,442
I don't even remember what reason she

440
00:28:27,442 --> 00:28:30,243
gave me why Elaine needed to

441
00:28:30,243 --> 00:28:32,803
die. Listen,

442
00:28:33,283 --> 00:28:36,163
Eric, your father wasn't the only

443
00:28:36,163 --> 00:28:38,043
person in this world who deserves a

444
00:28:38,043 --> 00:28:40,723
little punishment. I

445
00:28:40,723 --> 00:28:43,483
didn't care what the reason was. There's

446
00:28:43,483 --> 00:28:45,603
just no reason that she could give that

447
00:28:45,603 --> 00:28:48,483
would make it OK. My father

448
00:28:48,563 --> 00:28:51,204
was an obvious, imminent physical

449
00:28:51,284 --> 00:28:51,844
threat.

450
00:28:54,124 --> 00:28:56,884
Elaine could never have become a threat.

451
00:29:13,925 --> 00:29:15,925
She wouldn't put her own neck on the line

452
00:29:15,925 --> 00:29:18,325
for this. If I wasn't there to pull the

453
00:29:18,325 --> 00:29:21,205
trigger, nothing else could happen. She'd

454
00:29:21,205 --> 00:29:22,885
just be spinning her wheels.

455
00:29:25,045 --> 00:29:27,685
Once I came to the conclusion that, well,

456
00:29:27,685 --> 00:29:30,165
if I'm not here, nothing can happen.

457
00:29:30,565 --> 00:29:33,526
It becomes a simple matter of what

458
00:29:33,526 --> 00:29:34,566
is my way out.

459
00:29:35,846 --> 00:29:38,406
So I decided to join the Navy.

460
00:29:40,886 --> 00:29:43,526
I didn't even make it through boot

461
00:29:43,526 --> 00:29:46,246
camp before

462
00:29:47,126 --> 00:29:48,806
it all started becoming unraveled.

463
00:29:57,607 --> 00:29:58,887
I wind up calling home.

464
00:30:01,047 --> 00:30:03,207
I said hello, and the next thing I'm

465
00:30:03,207 --> 00:30:05,527
hearing is there was an accident.

466
00:30:06,247 --> 00:30:08,567
What?Your brother and I need your help.

467
00:30:09,447 --> 00:30:12,007
I need to come home. Now?Yes,

468
00:30:12,648 --> 00:30:13,768
right away. We need you.

469
00:30:15,448 --> 00:30:16,408
Elaine's dead.

470
00:30:22,008 --> 00:30:24,168
I tried. To get away

471
00:30:24,808 --> 00:30:26,248
so that it couldn't happen.

472
00:30:28,168 --> 00:30:30,968
And I failed to

473
00:30:30,968 --> 00:30:33,529
take into account the fact that

474
00:30:33,929 --> 00:30:36,169
she was just going to get my brother to

475
00:30:36,169 --> 00:30:36,809
do it.

476
00:30:39,849 --> 00:30:42,409
I don't know what exactly my mother had

477
00:30:42,409 --> 00:30:45,129
told him, but I'm sure that

478
00:30:45,289 --> 00:30:47,689
she probably had conversations with him

479
00:30:48,409 --> 00:30:50,929
like she did with me to, you know,

480
00:30:50,969 --> 00:30:52,649
scoot him in that direction.

481
00:30:54,090 --> 00:30:55,290
Now what do we do?

482
00:31:05,700 --> 00:31:08,020
When I get out of boot camp and I finally

483
00:31:08,020 --> 00:31:10,820
do get home, me and my

484
00:31:10,820 --> 00:31:13,660
mother go downstairs and she

485
00:31:13,660 --> 00:31:14,821
shows me the freezer.

486
00:31:16,421 --> 00:31:19,021
There's there's these chains going around

487
00:31:19,021 --> 00:31:21,781
and big padlock with a key

488
00:31:22,181 --> 00:31:23,781
and she's got to take all this stuff off

489
00:31:23,781 --> 00:31:24,541
to open it up.

490
00:31:26,891 --> 00:31:29,571
But she finally gets the thing open, and

491
00:31:30,331 --> 00:31:31,691
there's a freezer full of

492
00:31:32,891 --> 00:31:33,931
garbage bags.

493
00:31:39,322 --> 00:31:41,082
40 bags of grandma.

494
00:31:48,082 --> 00:31:48,612
What the ?

495
00:31:53,962 --> 00:31:55,322
What the hell is wrong with you?

496
00:31:59,613 --> 00:32:02,253
This mess is your fault, Eric.

497
00:32:03,453 --> 00:32:06,373
She tried to throw back at me that

498
00:32:06,373 --> 00:32:08,853
the reason the situation had spiraled

499
00:32:08,853 --> 00:32:11,533
into this is because I wasn't there to do

500
00:32:11,533 --> 00:32:13,773
it. So my brother had to do it.

501
00:32:14,493 --> 00:32:16,573
And what was I going to do about it now?

502
00:32:17,254 --> 00:32:19,854
We're all in this together, Eric. So

503
00:32:19,854 --> 00:32:20,774
solve this problem.

504
00:32:24,734 --> 00:32:26,334
The only thing I could think to tell her

505
00:32:26,334 --> 00:32:28,254
was try and keep everything calm.

506
00:32:29,454 --> 00:32:32,414
Make it look like Elaine is alive and

507
00:32:32,414 --> 00:32:34,174
well on a vacation somewhere or

508
00:32:34,174 --> 00:32:37,134
something. And

509
00:32:38,815 --> 00:32:40,975
don't do anything else to attract

510
00:32:40,975 --> 00:32:41,615
attention.

511
00:32:44,415 --> 00:32:47,015
I still don't have any idea what to

512
00:32:47,015 --> 00:32:49,855
do about the body. I don't care

513
00:32:49,855 --> 00:32:52,095
how you fix it, big man.

514
00:32:53,215 --> 00:32:54,095
Just fix it.

515
00:32:57,615 --> 00:32:59,376
All I wanted at that point was to just

516
00:33:00,336 --> 00:33:01,136
get away.

517
00:33:09,986 --> 00:33:12,066
Pack up the truck and away I go.

518
00:33:13,426 --> 00:33:15,426
Round about Tennessee,

519
00:33:16,226 --> 00:33:18,546
I'm smelling something bad.

520
00:33:20,547 --> 00:33:22,147
There's an ice chest

521
00:33:23,187 --> 00:33:26,067
with a rather familiar

522
00:33:26,067 --> 00:33:28,467
looking bag inside of it.

523
00:33:31,297 --> 00:33:33,537
I'm carrying a body across the country.

524
00:33:36,257 --> 00:33:39,057
She put the chest in there. Not

525
00:33:39,057 --> 00:33:41,298
even any warning. It's just

526
00:33:42,098 --> 00:33:43,298
surprise.

527
00:33:49,938 --> 00:33:52,258
Yeah, it's not like I can dump this in a

528
00:33:52,258 --> 00:33:54,898
garbage somewhere or bury it.

529
00:33:55,458 --> 00:33:57,778
The only thing I could think to do was

530
00:33:58,178 --> 00:34:00,178
hold on to it so nobody else finds it.

531
00:34:01,539 --> 00:34:03,859
So I just keep going to San Diego.

532
00:34:11,859 --> 00:34:14,419
So I'm going down the highway and

533
00:34:14,859 --> 00:34:17,379
all of a sudden I see lights come on

534
00:34:17,619 --> 00:34:19,859
and this cop is pulling me over

535
00:34:22,020 --> 00:34:24,900
and he starts going back to.

536
00:34:25,220 --> 00:34:27,260
you know, take a look at everything,

537
00:34:27,260 --> 00:34:29,380
because that's what troopers do. They're

538
00:34:29,380 --> 00:34:31,020
going to look for something unusual.

539
00:34:32,580 --> 00:34:34,500
He starts to go on about what's in the

540
00:34:34,500 --> 00:34:37,300
chest. And

541
00:34:37,300 --> 00:34:40,260
now I have crossed

542
00:34:40,260 --> 00:34:43,141
the line. He's either going to kill me or

543
00:34:43,141 --> 00:34:44,181
I'm going to kill him.

544
00:35:02,742 --> 00:35:04,822
What am I supposed to do?

545
00:35:11,062 --> 00:35:13,062
This cop is pulling me over.

546
00:35:17,862 --> 00:35:18,742
What's in the cooler?

547
00:35:20,742 --> 00:35:21,302
Not much.

548
00:35:25,703 --> 00:35:27,663
All right, well, I'm gonna go take a

549
00:35:27,663 --> 00:35:30,343
look. All of this is

550
00:35:30,343 --> 00:35:33,263
now blown up, and it's about

551
00:35:33,263 --> 00:35:34,183
to hit the fan.

552
00:35:39,543 --> 00:35:42,503
I am, at that point, more than willing to

553
00:35:43,023 --> 00:35:45,384
get rid of him. and stop this from

554
00:35:45,384 --> 00:35:48,344
happening. There is no

555
00:35:48,344 --> 00:35:50,184
turning back when you're that far in.

556
00:36:02,224 --> 00:36:03,544
And a speeder comes by.

557
00:36:07,225 --> 00:36:09,305
I just blew the doors off of everything.

558
00:36:15,385 --> 00:36:17,225
The trooper abandons the hole,

559
00:36:18,265 --> 00:36:20,105
investigate what's wrong with me and

560
00:36:20,105 --> 00:36:21,865
takes off after the speeder.

561
00:36:26,066 --> 00:36:26,586
Great.

562
00:36:30,746 --> 00:36:32,506
This is good. I'm just going to get down

563
00:36:32,506 --> 00:36:34,426
the road before that trooper comes back.

564
00:36:45,386 --> 00:36:48,107
When I got out to San Diego, I

565
00:36:48,587 --> 00:36:50,107
rented a storage unit

566
00:36:51,227 --> 00:36:53,067
and put the ice chest in a storage unit.

567
00:36:56,267 --> 00:36:58,667
There was this period for a couple of

568
00:36:58,667 --> 00:37:00,187
weeks where there actually wasn't any

569
00:37:00,187 --> 00:37:01,547
contact with my mother.

570
00:37:02,907 --> 00:37:05,547
So I I kind of thought that

571
00:37:05,867 --> 00:37:07,708
things were leveling out. It was getting

572
00:37:07,708 --> 00:37:08,268
safe.

573
00:37:11,068 --> 00:37:12,428
Then my mother shows up.

574
00:37:17,868 --> 00:37:20,188
We had to come, Eric. You have no idea

575
00:37:20,188 --> 00:37:22,068
what's happening at home. They keep

576
00:37:22,108 --> 00:37:24,428
asking questions. Where is Elaine?When is

577
00:37:24,428 --> 00:37:25,868
she coming back?Your brother is scared

578
00:37:25,868 --> 00:37:28,509
out of his mind. She couldn't keep

579
00:37:28,509 --> 00:37:30,909
stalling people and telling them that,

580
00:37:31,069 --> 00:37:32,669
you know, Elaine's on vacation.

581
00:37:32,909 --> 00:37:35,229
Everything is completely falling apart.

582
00:37:35,629 --> 00:37:38,109
One of the relatives finally called the

583
00:37:38,109 --> 00:37:38,669
police.

584
00:37:42,109 --> 00:37:44,989
Well, it just so happens that they

585
00:37:44,989 --> 00:37:47,109
wound up getting in touch with the same

586
00:37:47,109 --> 00:37:48,990
detective who had investigated my

587
00:37:48,990 --> 00:37:49,870
father's death,

588
00:37:52,030 --> 00:37:54,270
and nothing ever sat well with him.

589
00:37:55,070 --> 00:37:57,790
He started digging into it. This is on

590
00:37:57,790 --> 00:38:00,430
you, Eric. You have to help us. If we go

591
00:38:00,430 --> 00:38:03,190
down, you go down. OK. At that

592
00:38:03,190 --> 00:38:05,550
point, I was ready to

593
00:38:05,790 --> 00:38:08,590
abandon the Navy and run like

594
00:38:08,590 --> 00:38:11,551
hell. Now, Eric, we're leaving now. Go.

595
00:38:30,282 --> 00:38:31,082
Well, that's me.

596
00:38:33,362 --> 00:38:35,242
And that's my mother in the background.

597
00:38:36,432 --> 00:38:37,392
Right behind me,

598
00:38:39,152 --> 00:38:41,912
whispering in my ear. Don't tell them

599
00:38:41,912 --> 00:38:44,512
anything. Don't cooperate.

600
00:38:45,232 --> 00:38:48,032
Just stay silent and

601
00:38:48,032 --> 00:38:49,232
see how it plays out.

602
00:38:50,913 --> 00:38:53,673
So I, of course, didn't cooperate with

603
00:38:53,673 --> 00:38:53,873
them.

604
00:39:01,073 --> 00:39:03,393
We got split up almost immediately.

605
00:39:04,753 --> 00:39:06,353
My brother started talking

606
00:39:07,313 --> 00:39:10,193
probably within an hour of beingarrested,

607
00:39:12,834 --> 00:39:14,674
but I can't really blame him for it. I

608
00:39:14,674 --> 00:39:17,234
mean, he was, he was a

609
00:39:17,234 --> 00:39:20,034
15 year old kid looking at going to

610
00:39:20,514 --> 00:39:23,394
prison for more than half of his life.

611
00:39:25,234 --> 00:39:28,194
So he said whatever they wanted him to

612
00:39:28,194 --> 00:39:28,594
say

613
00:39:31,314 --> 00:39:33,875
and my mother.

614
00:39:36,115 --> 00:39:37,835
She had the best attorney she could

615
00:39:37,835 --> 00:39:40,755
arrange and was dumping

616
00:39:40,755 --> 00:39:42,035
everything on my head.

617
00:39:43,795 --> 00:39:46,675
But at that point it

618
00:39:46,675 --> 00:39:49,395
still hadn't occurred to me that maybe I

619
00:39:49,395 --> 00:39:51,155
should cut a deal, maybe I should

620
00:39:51,155 --> 00:39:52,115
cooperate.

621
00:39:56,756 --> 00:39:59,716
When I was a child, I promised

622
00:39:59,716 --> 00:40:02,436
that I would see this through. I

623
00:40:02,436 --> 00:40:05,156
promised that I would be the one to take

624
00:40:05,156 --> 00:40:07,156
the fall and

625
00:40:09,556 --> 00:40:11,636
trying to convince me even

626
00:40:12,276 --> 00:40:15,157
7-8 years later that I need to break

627
00:40:15,157 --> 00:40:17,877
that promise. That

628
00:40:17,877 --> 00:40:20,037
was not an easy thing.

629
00:40:23,397 --> 00:40:24,357
And that was that

630
00:40:27,557 --> 00:40:29,437
was probably one of the hardest choices I

631
00:40:29,437 --> 00:40:30,117
ever made.

632
00:41:00,209 --> 00:41:03,089
I'm never going to say it's my mother's

633
00:41:03,089 --> 00:41:05,169
fault that I shot my father,

634
00:41:06,449 --> 00:41:08,129
because in the end,

635
00:41:09,409 --> 00:41:11,009
I made a choice.

636
00:41:14,919 --> 00:41:17,080
She has to deal with the choices that she

637
00:41:17,080 --> 00:41:19,880
made. She's the one that had the

638
00:41:19,880 --> 00:41:22,800
grudge. She's the

639
00:41:22,800 --> 00:41:24,040
one that wanted them dead.

640
00:41:26,280 --> 00:41:29,080
There she is. That would be my

641
00:41:29,080 --> 00:41:31,960
mother. I

642
00:41:31,960 --> 00:41:33,960
haven't seen a picture of her in 20

643
00:41:33,960 --> 00:41:36,761
years. She looks like she's getting

644
00:41:36,761 --> 00:41:39,481
old now, and they're going to

645
00:41:39,481 --> 00:41:41,841
look at those eyes and go, it's just a

646
00:41:41,841 --> 00:41:43,241
sad old lady.

647
00:41:45,081 --> 00:41:47,361
That is not a sad old lady. That's a

648
00:41:47,361 --> 00:41:48,761
scheme waiting to happen.

649
00:41:50,201 --> 00:41:52,921
The body may be getting old. The hate

650
00:41:52,921 --> 00:41:55,801
goes on. She's not reformed.

651
00:41:55,801 --> 00:41:58,442
She's not rehabilitated. She

652
00:41:58,442 --> 00:42:00,282
doesn't think of herself as evil.

653
00:42:01,642 --> 00:42:04,282
But look at everybody that was

654
00:42:04,282 --> 00:42:06,922
associated with her. Her

655
00:42:06,922 --> 00:42:08,882
children both wound up going through

656
00:42:08,882 --> 00:42:11,722
prison. Her husband's dead.

657
00:42:13,802 --> 00:42:15,602
There wasn't anybody in her life that

658
00:42:15,602 --> 00:42:17,322
wasn't one of her victims.

659
00:42:18,843 --> 00:42:21,563
We all paid varying cost. Some paid with

660
00:42:21,563 --> 00:42:24,443
their lives, but

661
00:42:24,603 --> 00:42:25,883
everybody paid something.